Going through a break up? Here’s a quick break down to breaking up:
DONT’S
Beg/plead/bargain to get back together—you shouldn’t have to convince someone that they should be with you. The right person will recognize you are a catch!
Drunk dial your ex—you’ll regret it in the morning
Self-medicate with drugs/alcohol
Lure your ex back with sex—the fleeting physical intimacy won’t mend your broken heart
Spend hours stalking your ex on social media
Show up at your ex’s house unannounced
Contact him/her in moments of weakness—that’s what friends are for
Put your ex on a pedestal—in your mind, you may be highlighting all of their wonderful qualities, but there are likely many things that bugged you or you wish you could change
Compare every new person you date to your ex—if your ex was really that amazing, you’d still be dating but ultimately something was wrong with your relationship
Rebound with every person that shows you attention—ultimately you may just feel worse about yourself (and no one likes STDs)
DO’s
Get support from your besties & bros—you’re not a burden, this is what friends are for
Cry if you need to—there’s no shame
Give yourself permission to wallow in sadness for a distinct period of time—grab your ice cream and sweat pants! After a few days, if you miss work, isolate yourself from friends/family, and stop doing activities you enjoy, you may want to seek professional support
Pick up a new hobby, like boxing or a cooking class
Reconnect with old friends
Invest yourself in work—set new career goals
Keep a busy schedule because down time is usually the hardest
Drink responsibly in a social setting, not alone in your room
Give yourself time and space to process your emotions—you can try journaling, bibliotherapy (reading books/blogs), or talking to a counselor
Remove your ex from social media and shared accounts
Create space by not talking to or seeing your ex—aim for two months, then reevaluate communicating if you’re still obsessing over it (at this point, you may not even remember his/her name)! Be weary that connecting with your ex may trigger intense emotions and you might take steps backwards
Accept that no matter the reason for the break up, the outcome is still the same—you’re broken up and the relationship on some level was broken
Accept that when your ex ended the relationship, they were choosing to live their life without you. You deserve someone who recognizes the awesomeness that you are and who can’t live without you!
Create your own closure with positive self-talk—tell yourself that you deserve better and that someone will be lucky to have you
Accept that you can’t control other people—you can only control yourself and your reaction to them
Start dating again when you feel ready
Be optimistic that time is the best cure for a broken heart
Get support from your besties & bros—you’re not a burden, this is what friends are for
Cry if you need to—there’s no shame
Give yourself permission to wallow in sadness for a distinct period of time—grab your ice cream and sweat pants! After a few days, if you miss work, isolate yourself from friends/family, and stop doing activities you enjoy, you may want to seek professional support
Pick up a new hobby, like boxing or a cooking class
Reconnect with old friends
Invest yourself in work—set new career goals
Keep a busy schedule because down time is usually the hardest
Drink responsibly in a social setting, not alone in your room
Give yourself time and space to process your emotions—you can try journaling, bibliotherapy (reading books/blogs), or talking to a counselor
Remove your ex from social media and shared accounts
Create space by not talking to or seeing your ex—aim for two months, then reevaluate communicating if you’re still obsessing over it (at this point, you may not even remember his/her name)! Be weary that connecting with your ex may trigger intense emotions and you might take steps backwards
Accept that no matter the reason for the break up, the outcome is still the same—you’re broken up and the relationship on some level was broken
Accept that when your ex ended the relationship, they were choosing to live their life without you. You deserve someone who recognizes the awesomeness that you are and who can’t live without you!
Create your own closure with positive self-talk—tell yourself that you deserve better and that someone will be lucky to have you
Accept that you can’t control other people—you can only control yourself and your reaction to them
Start dating again when you feel ready
Be optimistic that time is the best cure for a broken heart
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